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RADOVEDNICA BIBI
Bostjan Bellows, PhD. between. Ophthalmology
(Photo: iStockphoto)
"I often wonder where I made a mistake. Guilty Is that inconsistent sets limits? My son destroys them every day and I admit premnogokrat clone before the upset. Wonder even where this is going? Will escalated? She would scream that enough, but having already hear my son, how do you cover your ears with your hands, saying that it hurt. No. wants to listen lights albums to my sermons. uncompromisingly requires its otherwise be thrown to the ground, beaten with his head against the wall with her hands hitting face and screams ... That screaming roar ... is unbearable. Passers-by probably think with horror lights albums of what is going on in our house, but I am sure that even for a moment, is not it, that our three year old beats fighting with the set limits. His response is usually triggered lights albums my prohibition. implies a cartoon, even after he has last time for sleep, candy, before thoroughly eye-opening, often triggered lights albums anger has it that in kindergarten.'d rather just see that he was home and I with him. The same is playing; required to sit next to him and it has provided a cube, otherwise it screams, jumping on the couch, it runs into the wall, "Mommy has entrusted us with Jana.
Psychologist Andrew Pšeničny emphasizes that we need to separate two things: someone's behavior lights albums and our emotional lights albums response to it. A distinction must therefore be made between the emotional pressure (passive aggression), and a sense of blackmail (emotional response).
Children that are trying in their own way to achieve the desired, with pressure on our borders. From ourselves depends lights albums on how we experience the pressure and how we respond. So we feel an emotional pressure as extortion in a case where, due to their own feelings of inadequacy lights albums react with guilt and shame.
Calm, clear and strong we need to set healthy boundaries and stick with them without angry and intolerant responses. At the same time we need to clarify with you why we are afraid that if a child placed clear limits and requirements, lost his love. Maybe it's because the child themselves, take affection when we disappoint or upset, but we are afraid to feel the same as me?
Same brings unwanted results lights albums when (due to unconscious feelings of guilt and shame) Pressure respond with anger and rejection of the child. It is normal for children to test our borders and fight in ways that are accessible to him. Since the objective in a weaker lights albums position and it depends lights albums on us, using emotional levers that we can allow ourselves. If you respond to emotional pressure (emotionally), it will just repeat.
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